The Heart of the Jedi
by waikiki23
Summary: Luke Skywalker is in hiding and has been for over 20 years after his nephew destroys everything that was important to the last Jedi. Now that he's been found, Luke has to work past the trauma he's endured to once again help to save the galaxy. Can the heart of this Jedi handle it?


"Nooooo!"

Luke Skywalker sat up quickly, his screams still echoed in his head and in the dark, empty room he resided in.

His breathing was sharp and ragged, as his head dropped into his shaking hands. The dream, no... nightmare, had been getting worse. He tried taking in deep breaths to calm his nerves, but it wasn't working so much. His nerves were raw and his emotions were all over the place. That's something that usually didn't happen to the ever calm Jedi.

The nightmares were so intense. Before, he had had them every night, terrorizing him so much, during the darkest time of his life. Finally, after a few years, Luke was able to make peace with all that had happened that fateful night.

But ever since he had felt Han's death a few days before, the nightmares were starting again. Luke felt as if he'd lost his family all over again.

 **He had been in a meditative trance, trying to continue to keep the broken pieces of his life in order so he could bear his heartache, when out of nowhere, it felt like he had been stabbed in the heart, pain searing him to his soul.**

 **He stretched out again into the force, feeling Ben, no Kylo's, severe heartache, stemming from...**

 **"No! Ben!!! What have you done?" Luke asked aloud, his mind reeling at what he just felt. His nephew had gone so far out of the light, and killed his father. "Oh Ben, why? Why Han?"**

 **He could feel Han's presence in the force blink out in a fury of passion and love. Hot tears fell unbidden as Luke stood, mourning for his friend and brother. "Safe travels my brother. You were the best smuggler, pilot, friend, and brother." Luke saluted the sky, tears falling as he watched the sun sink, bursting with color, almost as if it was a salute to the man who had the most colorful presence in his life.**

 **But, amidst the darkness pressing around him, Luke could feel a sliver of hope. He could feel some light creeping in to Ben's presence. "Ben, you still have some good in you! Just like your grandfather! You can make this right. Please make this right!" Luke thought to himself.**

Luke wiped the fresh tears away before he swung his legs over the edge of his bed and stood up. He knew sleep would not happen again for the night. He put a robe on, slipping out of his room and into the living room. He knew it was a little while before the sunrise, so he decided to sit outside and watch the stars.

He grabbed a blanket on one of the chairs as he opened his back door. Luke walked out and sat at the edge of his small rock patio. He watched the stars gleam and twinkle against the blackness of space. It was something he loved so much.

But he wasn't seeing the stars now. He was seeing the bodies of the younglings he had been teaching on Yavin, their poor bodies mutilated from angry red lightsabers. The sheer panic and terror he felt after seeing his future decimated was so intense, so fresh to him, 25 years later.

Luke again looked to the sky. Space was where Han loved to be. He may have been a smuggler, but he loved being in space, on his beloved Millennium Falcon, Chewie at his side. "Safe travels, my friend," he thought to himself, saluting to the open sky. He brushed the moisture leaking from his eyes, causing the stars to blur as he wiped them away, causing fresh ones to fall. He missed Leia and Han so much.

"I'm sorry," Luke whispered to the air, regret and sorrow washing over him.

It was moments like these that he missed Mara and Carrey the most. Mara would have came out and plopped down next to him, taking his arm in hers and just silently watch the stars with him, hugging him close to her.

Carrey, or Rey as she was know to the family, would have come skipping outside and sat in his lap. Anything bad happening in his life would be turned around by her sunny personality. She was such a ray of light in his and Mara's life.

Fresh tears stung Luke's eyes, making it that much harder to hold back his despair and heartache. He missed his soulmate so much, the hole in his heart still not healed. The death of his beautiful wife devastated him. But then came Rey's disappearance and what he felt was her death. Her passing drilled his already aching heart wide open with grief.

That night haunted him; his dreams, every waking moment of his life. All he could see was himself coming back to Yavin after a short planet hop. He had been told there were some Jedi artifacts on Felicia. He didn't find anything; so he came back to Yavin. It seems just like it was yesterday, the memory crashing over him like angry waves of the sea.

 **It was the early part of evening when he touched down on Yavin. He grabbed the small doll and exotic flower for his beautiful family. He secured the ship and headed for home.**

 **As soon as started walking, he could feel something was terribly wrong. The dark side was everywhere, wrapping is black tentacles on everything in its path, something that had never happened before. The power and anger bleeding from the dark side felt a little familiar, almost like his father's force sense when he fought Vader in Cloud City.**

 **Luke pulled out his lightsaber, unsure of what was happening. The darkness didn't allow the light to shine through, or let him feel what was going on. He started to smell whiffs of smoke the closer he got.**

 **He could then feel the terror of his padawans. Suddenly he could feel their light blinking out one by one.**

 **In the middle of feeling the younglings deaths, Mara's force presence extinguished in a burst of light.**

 **He fell to his knees at the edge of the treeline, right outside the temple. The temple which he had worked so hard to establish was burning so hot and angry, similar to the dark side that he was feeling.**

 **Suddenly, R2-D2 rolled up to him quietly, beeping softly and sadly. Luke put his hand out and touched the dome of his faithful droid. He cried, tears blurring the fire into just an orange mass, his wife's death devouring his thoughts, along with the deaths of the padawans.**

Luke was brought out of his thoughts by the first beautiful rays of sunshine. His beautiful Rey would've loved to be sitting with him, watching the sunrise with her daddy.

Ben, his nephew and a promising Jedi, had destroyed not only his future with the Jedi, but his family as well. That night he lost everything he knew and loved.

The sun shone brighter as it lifted higher into the sky. Rey loved this part of the morning, when the sun's rays began to touch everything in its path and sparkle. Ben would join them sometimes, his feelings of homesickness getting the best of him but disappearing for a little while when he was with Luke and Rey. Luke loved when Ben would join them. At 6 years old, he and Rey had a special bond, one he thought would never be broken.

Luke looked again to the sky, the remnants of his dream washing over him. "Oh my beautiful daughter, how I miss you and your mother," he thought as last remnants of sunrise gave way to the bright sun, full of promise and hope for the day. "Oh my beautiful Mara. How I miss talking to you! And my baby girl Rey, I miss you more than you would ever know," Luke whispered, the grief still fresh in his heart 20 years later.

Slowly Luke stood, pulling his daughter's blanket close as he looked once again at the vastness of the water before him. He stood outside for a moment more before turning and going into his home.


End file.
